Hold fast the form of sound words, which thou hast heard of me, in faith and love which is in Christ Jesus (2 Timothy 1:13)

Friday Night Notes

Saturday, December 01, 2007
needing some serious perfecting...

We went out preaching the Gospel in the middle of a blizzard tonight. It was slow getting anywhere near the marketplace; it was difficult to hold up our Bible signs in the wind; it was near impossible to keep our Gospel tracts from getting wet due to the blowing snow dancing all around us. Yet, despite these difficulties, for nearly three hours, pastor Tim and I presented the Gospel to hundreds of souls who otherwise, would have gone yet another day without the slightest trace of the Gospel of Jesus Christ. I praise God for another Friday night in which I could go out and be an ambassador for the Lord Jesus Christ.

That said, I must say I'm pretty annoyed with myself tonight. I don't feel I have done particularly well in our evangelistic effort, and I have no one to blame but myself. From the very first hour, I found myself being of very little help to a young couple who claimed to be Christians but as far as I could tell, by judging the fruit (Matthew 7:16-20), there wasn't much evidence of genuine faith. These two souls should have gotten a "Paul Washer" style wake-up call from me tonight, but I instead tip-toed around the issue of genuine salvation and assurance, not wanting to offend my hearers by questioning their claim to be saved. The whole exchange was an overall mess; a mess that I am sure the Lord could still use for good, but I didn't do well at all, and I know it.

Then there was Collin, the parking garage attendant. I asked the Lord to give me opportunity to deal with Collin more earnestly because clearly, Collin has never and still isn't seeking the Lord with all his heart. He says he is, but it is clear he isn't. He finally showed up while pastor Tim was preaching, and the two of them chatted for a few minutes. When I finally made it on the scene, Collin was leaving. I could have asked him to stick around for a couple of minutes so I could speak to him about truly seeking the Lord, but I instead let him leave. Perhaps this was of the Lord, but then again, perhaps this was just me not seizing the opportunity God was giving me.

And that's how my night of street preaching generally went. I always seemed to be second guessing, not being sure if I was doing/saying the right thing. In the words of the prophet Daniel, what I had was "confusion of face"; and I know all too well why this is the case with me. I am not drawing nigh to God as I ought, therefore, He isn't drawing nigh to me to help me and guide me (James 4:8). In a nutshell, I have and am being given a lesson by Almighty God; a lesson in humility and dependence on Him. I need to take note, for my own good.

Please dear readers, I beg you, don't offer me any comments defending my sad effort tonight. It isn't what I need, I assure you. Again, to quote missionary Paul Washer: "don't try to fix what the Lord has broken." Please pray for me, that I would be more disciplined in meditating on God's Word and seeking the Lord's direction in all things through prayer. That's what I need.

With that, I hope you all have a great weekend, especially the Lord's Day. God bless you all, dear readers.